


Teamwork for Two

by WonderMint



Category: Naruto
Genre: Bondage, Contrived Premise, Hand Jobs, Kakashi Should Be In Jail, M/M, One Shot, Oral Sex, Swearing, Underage Ninjas, Yaoi, mutual dubcon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-01
Updated: 2014-07-01
Packaged: 2018-07-15 04:42:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 15,987
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7208174
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WonderMint/pseuds/WonderMint
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sasuke and Naruto find themselves alone, bound completely, and forbidden from using chakra.  They have one goal: escape.  No, wait.  Kill Kakashi.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Teamwork for Two

**Author's Note:**

> Before I started writing fanfic in earnest, I wrote this.
> 
> I didn't get much response, and figured I didn't have the knack for it. Years later, I can finally look back at it and see the seeds of something more. So, here it is, transplanted from its original home for your entertainment. Contrived bondage ahoy!

 

 

The morning began innocently enough. As usual, Sasuke and Naruto were alternately ignoring and insulting each-other, waiting in their usual spot on the bridge. Sakura tried to stay out of their disputes, as they now bored her more than anything. She only spoke up when Naruto was particularly unfair to Sasuke, unable to control her inner childish impulses which more often than not led to violence. Her Sasuke was her Sasuke. Nothing changed that.

 

Well, he did seem more surly. Something was eating Sasuke from the inside, and he seemed even more distant than when they took their first steps as Genin. Of all the abuse Sasuke poured on Naruto's head, it was clear that it was only a fraction of his irritation. He was distant, distracted, impatient with both of them. Some days it seemed as though he looked right through them, seeing nothing but a distant horizon he couldn’t reach.

 

But inevitably, their teacher appeared, perching comfortably on the thin red railing. "Sorry," he said predictably, his good-natured smile evident from under his mask. "I saw a rainbow-colored unicorn in the forest, and tried to catch it so my wishes would come true!"

 

"Liar!" All three children forgot their troubles for their morning ritual. It was idiotic, but not challenging Kakashi's daily excuse would have been to give it sanction. Make it real. Acknowledge that their sensei had ridden a unicorn to see them, rainbow trailing behind is it leapt over the river and through the woods.

 

Sakura saw an opening, and she was kunoichi enough to take it. "What's your wish, then, Kakashi-sensei? You owe it to us to at least tell us what was so important as to keep us waiting all morning!" She pointed accusingly while she said it, hoping her bearing was enough to demand a verdict.

 

"Ah... well. My wish..." Kakashi was looking devious, now. Dangerous. "My wish is to see you all work as a team, and achieve your true potential. And since I caught it, it looks like I'll be getting my wish." All three children just stared, mouths wide open. Did he really say such a stupid thing? Their teacher raised a finger to signal a transition out of nonsense-land. "Yes, today we'll be training all of you on your weak points, so you can show your true potential! We'll break into teams to focus on your individual problem areas." He was smiling far too much. Far, far too much.

 

A shadow appeared behind Naruto and Sasuke, an enemy on the attack. Sakura detected a moment of disorientation marking a strong genjutsu in effect, and turned in time to see a duplicate of Kakashi finish a string of seals and touch one hand each on Naruto and Sasuke's backs. They fell immediately, eyes closed in a deep sleep. The other Kakashi caught them and slung them both onto his shoulders.

 

"Kakashi-sensei! What are you doing!?" Sakura was shocked and terrified to see her teammates attacked by their own teacher. Her kunai was in her hand without thinking about it, running through scenarios. This Kakashi might well be an impostor, or not. If he was truly Kakashi, and she attacked him in error, she was unlikely to hurt him. If he was an impostor, or if he were truly Kakashi but acting on some evil motive, she had better act to save her friends. The risk-benefit analysis quickly concluded, she prepared to attack.

 

"Just what I said. We're breaking into teams, Sakura-chan." The original Kakashi had vanished, and only the second spoke to her now. His eyes were serious, his face calm. "Remember our first training together? This is like that. They have some teamwork problems to sort out." Sakura breathed a little easier, put away her kunai. Those were real words of wisdom, and she found herself nodding along in agreement.

 

"What about me? We train as a team." Sakura had never forgotten that lesson, either.

 

"Aaah..." he appeared to consider for a moment, his visible eye closing as if in thought, but this was the fake consideration he did to either humor or infuriate whomever he was speaking to. Sakura twitched an eyebrow to indicate she hadn't the patience for it. Kakashi gave up and shifted the weight of the teens balanced on each shoulder, then turned to walk away. "I appreciate your team spirit. But this isn't a weak point for you, Sakura. Meet me back here after lunch, after I give the boys their instructions. Eat light, we'll be doing some intense taijutsu today." And then Kakashi vanished, and Sakura wondered what the hell her teacher was going to do, and whether it was better for her not to know.

 

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Sasuke woke up quickly, without the grog usually associated with sleep, but with all of the disorientation. "Rise and shine, Sasuke! Or maybe just shine." Kakashi was in front of him, crouched on his heels with his knees drawn up. That silly smile was on his face, so saccharine it reached to his uncovered eye. "Don't try to mold any chakra. I will explain in a moment."

 

He took some time to poll his senses. He was lying down, his cheek resting against something rough but not hard. He tried to get up but his arms wouldn't move. Nor would his legs. When he looked down, he found his entire body, from his toes to his neck, was bound like a spider's prey in a thick rope, and his hands were bound securely to his back. He flexed his fingers, and found that they were tightly contained in some kind of mittens. He couldn't even touch his restraints. He tried to shout, and found even his mouth bound by a huge piece of sticky tape. Was this some kind of sick joke?

 

He looked up now, to see that he was resting on Naruto's lap. Definitely sick... maybe not a joke. Naruto was bound similarly, propped upright against the foot of some kind of furniture. Sleeping, as Sasuke undoubtedly had been moments before. Kakashi was in motion already, and when he touched Naruto and muttered "Kai," the outrageously blond boy blinked quickly awake.

 

"Good morning, sunshine!" Kakashi was still playing innocent, and Sasuke's stomach twisted. He had trusted this man! The taste of betrayal was mixing with his breakfast in his stomach, and he felt sick. "Don't try to mold any chakra, Naruto, this is very important. Now listen."

 

Naruto's eyes wandered in much the same way as his had, and then he found Sasuke's gaze and seemed to become transfixed. A sorry sight he must have made, lying bound in Naruto's lap like some kind of present. Sasuke's teeth were grinding against each other so hard he wouldn't have been surprised if a snowy powder was coating the tape by the time it was pulled off.

 

If this explanation wasn't good, damn good, he was going to kill Kakashi before he even got around to Itachi.

 

Perhaps it was the poison in Sasuke's eyes which seemed to sober Kakashi somewhat. He dropped his silly act, and resumed his usual emotionless facial expression. "You seem to have forgotten your training, Sasuke. Do you remember the first day of training together? When you failed to collect these bells from me?" He held them up inches from Sasuke's face, as if they were still playing that same game, and all Sasuke wanted was a bell and not to rip the testicles straight off of the man in front of him. Sasuke refused to dignify that with even a grunt.

 

"Well. You passed the test that day, but you seem to have forgotten the lesson. Your teamwork..." here his eyes trailed up to Naruto, who seemed locked in a similar cycle of silent anger, "is abysmal. Your inability to work together for even ten minutes is a major liability to the team. Despite your ability as shinobi, you two are holding us back. One of these days, you're going to get a teammate killed. And it might not be one of you. How would you feel if Gaara had killed Sakura?" He looked back at Sasuke. "You chose to go after him alone, as if all that mattered was your little pissing contest with him, instead of going to your teammates to watch your back. She had to go to rescue YOU," he paused, knowing his words were slicing like a knife, "because you thought you were too good to work in a team. I don't know how Naruto managed to save her alone, but he shouldn't have had to. You aren't fit to be a Chuunin, and if this continues, you won't be fit to be a Genin either."

 

Sasuke's face was burning with shame now as well as anger. He thought he had been fighting to protect his village, but it was Naruto who had fought to protect Sakura, and done something he himself couldn't. Kakashi's gaze floated up to Naruto again, and Sasuke followed him. He expected some kind of triumph on Naruto's face, ever-delighted if he could best Sasuke, but he was merely enraged. "Now, now, remember," Kakashi chided quietly. "No chakra. You will regret it if you do." Immediately, Naruto relaxed a bit, angry but in control. "Naruto, you have improved significantly, and you have protected your team with your life. However, the fact remains that you haven't reached out to Sasuke. Your constant quibbling is an unnecessary distraction. Have you ever thought to make even a fraction of the effort to spend time with him as you do chasing after Sakura?"

 

Sasuke felt this was somewhat unfair. Naruto was a complete idiot, and never hesitated to start arguments, but they both knew very well what would happen if Naruto offered to take him out for ramen. But there was nothing they could say, they were playing by Kakashi's rules. Naruto merely wilted a bit, perhaps more than expected. He looked... sad. Distant. It pained Sasuke a little to see.

 

Wait, Sakura? Where was she? Sasuke was searching the room, looking for her, but other than the gray walls of what appeared to be a tiny, dimly lit holding cell, there was nothing. "Ah, you wonder about Sakura?" Kakashi had the air of someone holding a good secret, the kind they wanted you to find out. "Good, your training hasn't gone completely to waste. However, this is a teamwork training for just the two of you. This training would be far too easy for Sakura, and you would be finished as soon as you started. No, her weak point is taijutsu, and that is what we will be working on today." His open eye slid upwards a moment as if thinking. "But, it wouldn't hurt for you two to help her out with her physical training every once in a while, too, instead of always trying to out-do each other." Another moment of silent guilt, this time shared by Sasuke and Naruto both. Had they really never thought to work on her skills instead of their own?

 

"Now, as I promised, I will explain your training today. The first rule is... don't use any chakra. This is a test of teamwork, not power. To reinforce that point..." a gloved hand extended towards Sasuke's exposed shoulder, and Kakashi poked him with his index finger. "I have placed exploding tags on your chests. If these seals detect the molding of chakra, and believe me, they WILL detect it, they will both explode at once. So you see, you are protecting not only yourselves, but each other, just like real life, neh?" His eye crinkled again in a false smile, but his tone remained serious. "I have tried to make the explosions small, but as they are in a sensitive location, I can't guarantee the injuries won't be permanent... or fatal. So try not to die, please."

 

At this point, Naruto began screaming behind his makeshift gag. Kakashi poked his nose with the other hand, the jingle of bells following the motion. Naruto quieted immediately, eyes fearful but watchful. "Don't worry, as long as you don't break the rules intentionally, you won't die. Trust me." As if they could trust him now, or ever again! "Now, that being said, the goal of the game is simple. Escape. You have no weapons, no jutsus, and your only allies are each-other. Work together as a team, free yourself from your bonds, find the key to the cell, and leave." It was as if he were describing a fun game, not a twisted, deadly trap. "Once you do, come find me, and I'll disarm the tags. Don't think about yelling for help. This is an ANBU prison, and the guards know why you are here. You will not be disturbed. You will get no help unless the seals go off, and please, don't try to use that method to escape. I would be very disappointed in you."

 

Kakashi's disappointment was Sasuke's least concern.

 

"If you fail in your task, I will return in the morning to fetch you. Consider your lack of food and water until then an added incentive. And," he added in apparent afterthought, "you probably won't be able to use the facilities unless you free yourselves, either." He stood, finally, towering far above his students. "Consider this a simulation of a scenario in which you have been captured by hostiles. If you can't work together to free yourselves from such a simple prison, with no supervision, you have no hope of doing so in a real situation. Besides, there is a reward," He turned, and gave the bells in his hand one last jingle before tucking them away in his pocket. "If you complete this training exercise, you will have learned a valuable lesson about teamwork, and, possibly," he added darkly, "a little Omake."

 

A bonus. The only bonus Sasuke was interested in that moment was skinning Kakashi alive and possibly making a hat out of him. But then the silver-haired man walked out, closing a thick solid door behind him, and they heard several clicks as the tumblers of a heavy lock engaged.

 

Oh, someone was going to die, alright.

 

But first Sasuke had to get free.

 

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Naruto evidently had a similar thought, because Sasuke felt the legs beneath him twitch and wiggle. He was flailing wildly and testing every angle in an effort to pull himself free with brute force. He was getting nowhere, fast. Sasuke had no doubt that these ropes were tied with every ounce of Kakashi's skill, and maybe even a little chakra, and no Genin could simply squirm free. Kakashi must have had some kind of intention, a correct solution to the proposed puzzle. He looked around, unable to see much from his prone position, the jostling making it hard to focus on anything. Naruto seemed to have been bound directly to the foot of a bare metal bedframe, which was in turn riveted to the floor and the wall, which was only inches from Naruto's right side. He could see no seam or knot in the ropes that ran the length of his body, but Naruto seemed to be tied in two segments, he supposed so that he could sit more easily. Sasuke felt like a caterpillar in a cocoon, and sitting up was going to be hard. Then, he noticed a knot. It was just above Naruto's knee, on the side near the wall, and because the ropes were so thick, it probably wouldn't be too difficult to get it undone with his teeth.

 

First, he had to get his mouth free.

 

Well, that was probably going to be the easy part, if the dumbass would stop moving. He looked up at Naruto and made a loud grunting noise in his throat. When that didn't catch Naruto's attention, he lifted his chin, and brought it down in Naruto's lap. Hard.

 

That got a reaction. Naruto made an indignant noise, nostrils flared and eyes wide. He wasn't as close to Naruto's crotch as the other boy seemed to fear, but he was certainly closer than was healthy for either of them, and he meant to correct that immediately. He gave Naruto a steady glare just to indicate that he should hold still, and then he deliberately put his cheek down against the leg below him and... well, it might have looked like he was snuggling, but really, he was trying to rub the tape off. Sasuke opened and closed his mouth, drooling as much as he could to dissolve the sticky adhesive, and after several minutes he had worked the tape free.

 

There, mouth. That's a ninja tool. He looked up to see Naruto staring with wide-eyed incredulity. "What, dumbass? I got it off, didn't I?"

 

Naruto snorted, and Sasuke realized he may have phrased that incorrectly. Yes, Kakashi was going to die, but slowly. He was going to have to think of something good. Cattle prod? Sasuke caught himself mid-eye-roll shook his head instead. He wiped the saliva off his face on the ropes on Naruto's legs, before he realized that that must have looked pretty obscene as well. Ugh! He only hoped Naruto hadn't thought of it that way, and was glad of the tape over his mouth in any case. Sasuke was going to take a lot of hits to his pride today.

 

"If you want me to get that tape off your mouth, be quiet and hold still." Naruto complied, but his eyes never ceased their amusement as he watched Sasuke do the wriggling. He rolled off of Naruto's lap and began doing his best inchworm impression towards the foot of the bedframe. Then he used his teeth to grab the ropes at Naruto's side, less to hoist and more to balance as he slowly brought his legs up beneath him. After several minutes of struggle, he was finally sitting, more or less upright, at Naruto's side. His chin rested now on Naruto's shoulder, and he noticed suddenly that neither had their forehead protectors on. This was something he saw rarely on Naruto, and it made his hair flow more naturally around his ears. It looked surprisingly soft.

 

What a stupid thing to notice.

 

"Listen, Naruto." Sasuke spoke in a low voice, so near to Naruto's ear, and he felt he didn't want to speak these words too loudly anyhow. Naruto turned toward him slightly, giving him a side-wise but steady look. It wasn't often Sasuke spoke with names instead of insults. "We have to work together here, if we're going to get out of this alive... and I don't know about you, but I think Kakashi needs to die. Painfully." Another snort from Naruto, which he took as assent. "So I'm going to call a truce. We work together, we get out of this, and we go on a vendetta. No names, no teasing, no jokes. Just a mission. Agreed?"

 

Naruto nodded seriously. He had that look in his eyes, like he had decided something was going to happen, and when he did that... things happened, alright. Sasuke swallowed, momentarily dumbstruck, fighting back some unnamed feeling at the sight. This was insane, to be driven to this, but he couldn't go back. Only forward. "Alright... I'm going to take the tape off. Hold absolutely still, and remember, no dumb comments, or so help me Kami I will set these tags off myself."

 

One hundred percent aware of what it looked like he was about to do, Sasuke resisted the urge to lick his lips. He leaned forward to Naruto's cheek with more fear and trepidation than he'd ever felt facing an enemy ninja. Naruto was watching him, eyes boring into him like an iron drill. Nervous. Mindful of his upper lip, Sasuke let his teeth graze Naruto's cheek above the corner of the tape. He dragged down slightly, and he thought he saw Naruto twitch just a tad, before he nearly lost his balance and dropped his head back to Naruto's shoulder. He hadn't bitten him, but he had missed the tape, which meant he had to try again. It was a lot of effort to balance his entire body without the aid of arms or legs. He was sure he was using muscles that he hadn't known he had.

 

Naruto still hadn't moved, and was still watching him with steely eyes. No mocking, no disrespect. He could do this. He leaned back against the bedframe. "Move just a little closer and I can reach you from here." Naruto complied and rotated his head slowly, as if terrified of what a sudden movement might do, and Sasuke could reach now without straining and overbalancing. He scraped his teeth on Naruto's cheek, this time not missing but merely failing to catch the edge of the tape. And once again, with the same result. Deep, steady breath. He looked up, only to see that Naruto had closed his eyes. He was still utterly motionless, but now he seemed peaceful, almost as if he were asleep.

 

Sasuke thought that should have made it easier, but it didn't.

 

Well, in for a kunai, in for a katana. Sasuke closed his eyes too, and leaned in closer. The smell of his own saliva was distracting, reminding him even further of the intimate nature of what he was doing. This time, he pretended not to care that his upper lip was caressing soft skin. He bit into the tape, grabbing the edge easily now that he wasn't afraid to apply any pressure to Naruto's cheek, and pulled. He deliberately failed to hear Naruto's quick gasp of breath, then failed to notice that it happened well before he ripped the tape away. He failed to see Naruto's look of shock because his eyes really were closed, and he fell neatly backwards from the snap of his head that had pulled the tape free. He spit it out and failed to give Naruto a triumphant look, because it would be a minute before he could meet the other boy's eyes, and that was just fine.

 

They passed that minute in companionable denial, and their failure to say anything was a rousing success. If Naruto could keep quiet throughout the whole ordeal, they might just make it out of this to kill Kakashi-sensei another day.

 

"Ano..." or, alternatively, Naruto could decide to open his fat mouth after all.

 

"Thank you, Sasuke."

 

That was a surprise. His minute of avoidance spent, Sasuke looked up. Naruto's face was flushed from the tape still, but there was no mockery in his eyes. He wasn't sure what, in fact, that particular expression meant, but he could live with that for now. "Sure," Sasuke conceded. He was a big boy, he could say that much. "Step two, in the bag. Next..." deep breath. "It'll be easiest to find the knots in the rope. There's one by your knee but it'll be hard to get." He began to inch towards Naruto again, considering how best to counterbalance himself.

 

Naruto opened his mouth again. "You've got one behind your neck."

 

"Surprise." Or was it surprising that Naruto had a helpful suggestion? He reminded himself not to say as much, because dying by explosive seal was bad, and pissing himself because he squandered his time bickering was worse.

 

"If you get back up here I can get it." Naruto's voice was small and careful. A rare flower in the blizzard of Naruto's usual range of expression. It could be worse.

 

"Um... right." His resolve wavered for a moment, torn between waiting until morning, or crawling back up into such intimate proximity with Naruto again. His lips tingled traitorously, and he licked them before he could stop himself. Adhesive and salt.

 

He had to get out of this. Time for step three. Time to inchworm. It went more quickly this time, not that he especially wanted it to. Once he'd anchored himself against Naruto's shoulder, he rotated his hips and leaned his head against the bedframe to turn until his back was facing Naruto.

 

He waited.

 

"Um, I can't reach." Fuck!

 

"Fuck," said Sasuke intelligently.

 

"Sorry, I'm kind of stuck here. Maybe if you... sit..." No, Sasuke didn't need to hear the end of the sentence. He growled, and Naruto wisely fell silent. Sasuke couldn't do it if it got said out loud, that would make it real, and therefore impossible to do. He turned back again, like a dowel in a woodworker's lathe, and lurched forward into Naruto's shoulder, grabbing another mouthful of rope and hauling himself inward. Naruto yelped a few times in pain as he settled himself, then turned to face away from the wall and laid against Naruto's chest, his bound legs trailing on the floor next to them.

 

If they didn't talk about it, it wasn't happening, because things that weren't happening weren't worth talking about. That's how it worked.

 

There was a strange pulling sensation behind his neck, dangerously near the cursed black mark on his left shoulder. Then a puff of air, and suddenly he could feel every hair on his head, down his neck, even the tiny short hairs on his upper back, spring to attention. He waited, tense. And waited. Every once in a while, there would be a quick jerk, or a sound of rope against rope, and then more tiny movements. He felt every molecule move against his skin. His shoulder burned. His whole body burned.

 

The earlier part hadn't been hard, compared to this. Waiting, feeling, and doing nothing. Naruto was a saint to have endured it. Prime fucking Hokage material.

 

Sasuke was pretty sure he had been holding his head awkwardly in the air, but at some point that had stopped being true. His head was resting on Naruto's shoulder now, and a stiff feeling in his neck was slowly evaporating. He nearly jerked backwards and away when he realized, but that would call attention to his current position and subsequent discomfort. Not to mention launch him straight off of Naruto's lap. So he resisted the impulse and pretended the position was intentional, and that it was nothing like snuggling in a lover's lap. Whom he had just kissed on the cheek, and who was now blowing puffs of warm air onto the sensitive hairs at the nape of his neck.

 

The shiver that traveled down Sasuke's body then was one hundred percent involuntary, and at least twenty percent due to restricted blood-flow and pinched nerves.

 

Sasuke held his breath.

 

Naruto did too. Everything was still.

 

Then, Naruto pulled on the rope again, pulled rather hard, he felt a loose end cascade down his back.

 

Free! Without hesitation, Sasuke lurched forward onto the concrete floor. He didn't even care that the arms he mentally moved to break his fall were still securely bound, because he had his face to do that! None of that triviality mattered, as he rolled back and forth like a cat in a bed of catnip, slowly unraveling the rope. When it got loose enough he was able to simply kick the rest away, and he was left almost completely unhindered, lying on his stomach and stretching luxuriantly.

 

Free. Except for his arms.

 

A small detail. His arms were laid opposite each other behind his back, wrists bound in some kind of single-piece metal manacles. They were padded somehow and not too painful, though the blood rushing back into his limbs made his wrists throb. The mitten-like pockets still held his hands securely, and the manacles were well-fitted. Kakashi had mentioned keys. He cast his eyes around the tiny room, seeing nowhere that could even hide any small objects, except...

 

His eyes traveled back to Naruto. All of his thoughts were immediately driven away like sheep before a herd of elephants. The way Naruto was looking at him... like he had never seen Sasuke before. Like he had never seen the moon and feared it would fall on his head. Sasuke missed the rope just a little, because now he felt naked. Actually, he was wearing less than usual, as Kakashi seemed to have confiscated his weapons holsters and his loose blue overshirt with the high collar, leaving only his black undershirt and shorts. That must have been why his neck was so sensitive, and nothing at all to do with tiny puffs of breath on his skin. And the arousal he was beginning to feel now had nothing to do with the way Naruto's eyes were looking him over, not aggressively, but cautiously, as if he were afraid of looking so hard that he damaged Sasuke with the force of his eyes. Whatever was causing it, he suddenly felt more turned on than he'd ever been in his adolescent life. His cheeks felt hot, and he couldn't explain that away either.

 

Naruto finally looked him in the eyes, and Sasuke must have echoed that same deer-in-the-headlights look, because they both immediately broke the gaze and found some concrete surface to examine.

 

The next step... the next step... Sasuke desperately tried to force his mind back on track, and ignore the erection that he hoped his loose shorts would hide. The ropes at Naruto's legs. Safe, away from Naruto's roving eyes and his gentle mouth, and now that Sasuke's legs could move he was sure he could undo the rope easily. Using his forehead to brace against the floor (faces are almost as useful as hands, he was discovering), he brought his knees forward and under his center of gravity. Now he could walk on his knees, and probably stand if he tried. First things first. Without standing up too straight (there was totally a good reason for that), he shuffled forward with his knees, shoving stray rope out of his way like a train shoving stray cattle. Naruto's eyes were following him, but he could ignore that. Now he had to figure out how to kneel over Naruto's legs to reach the far side against the wall... while keeping his knees under his center of gravity. Which meant... straddling Naruto's ankles.

 

Sasuke rolled his eyes at himself. Did Kakashi plan this all out? Maybe Sasuke would obtain a confession. Maybe that would be too much detail and very creepy, and he canned that idea and went to work calculating the force he would need to fling one leg over Naruto while balancing on the other knee. Then it hit him that he didn't need to do that, and maybe he should think things through too instead of fantasizing--planning, really, not that other word--what he would do to Kakashi. Even if it seemed to be the only sane train of thought in his mind right now.

 

Naruto continued to watch him silently as he knee-walked to Naruto's feet, and then shimmied up far enough to get at his knees. It was as if Naruto was afraid that speaking would cause some spell to break, and Sasuke decided that if he didn't look Naruto in the eyes again, maybe it would stay that way.

 

Now he was kneeling in front of Naruto, and he was fully aware that this, too, was a pervert's dream come true. The flush in his cheeks wasn't dying down, and he ignored where else he might be affected, in order to concentrate on the knot in front of him. It wasn't a straightforward knot, and it was complicated a little by the fact that the loose ends were tucked securely into the bundle of rope, so it was difficult to see which parts needed pulling. He picked a likely rosette and went to work, and soon was focused enough to fight down his arousal and feel like he could look Naruto in the eye without falling apart. As long as Naruto kept his eyes in his head, too, and he was sure he could feel the other boy staring at him with the physical force of a punch to the gut. Pay attention! Grab, tug, look. Has anything changed? Another strand shortened. Grab, tug, look. Another knot seems tighter. Grab, tug.

 

It must have only taken a few minutes, but Sasuke rose from the task feeling refreshed, as if it were a night's sleep. He yanked on the loose end to undo the first loop, then backed off for Naruto to shake it free on his own. Naruto's eyes focused on him again. He had a dreamy look as if he, too, had been asleep, but he blinked it away and shook the cord loose, and then kicked his legs a few times.

 

"Eeeeeeyah, that's better!" For some reason, Sasuke didn't mind that the silence was interrupted, as long as the words were safe. "Now how do we get me loose from here?" He was looking behind himself ineffectually, a little cross-eyed. Sasuke obliged and knee-shuffled to the foot of the bedframe again. He could keep a safe distance this time, at least, even if he didn't know what he needed to be safe from. He lowered his head to peer beneath the bed, then looked around Naruto's shoulders.

 

Aha. Of course. "It's behind your other shoulder."

 

Naruto made a face of such agony and disappointment that Sasuke nearly allowed himself a smile. Of course, he couldn't, because he was feeling the same agony, because now he had to sit in Naruto's lap to get it. There was simply no way to reach it from the other side. Only now, it was going to feel a lot closer, the freedom from the rope making his clothing seem light and insubstantial. Sasuke took a deep breath and tried to mentally prepare himself.

 

"Ano, Sasuke," Naruto was saying. "You don't have to do this if you don't want to. We can wait. Or maybe figure out another way. Maybe we can chew..."

 

As tempting as that was sounding, Sasuke interrupted him. "That's silly. We've come this far, we don't have that much more to go. We can stand some close proximity for a few minutes." This almost sounded convincing, even to Sasuke. Naruto let out a sigh of... relief? Tension? And nodded. Resignation. Whatever it was Naruto was feeling, Sasuke was feeling just as awkward, and they weren't going to tease each other about it. So why not? They were just a couple of men doing completely normal manly activities, things that teammates have to do all the time. It was no different than punching each other stupid, or going to an onsen together (naked! No, don't think about it!), or sleeping next to each other every night on a mission. No, Sasuke didn't believe it, but when he looked up, Naruto was averting his eyes with a deliberation bordering on the heroic.

 

Thank you.

 

Sasuke shook the lingering thoughts out of his head, took another deep breath, and crawled up Naruto's legs again. This time, he didn't stop at the knees. When he got to Naruto's lap, where he could have sat down and straddled him completely, he instead avoided the landmine and straightened his legs, arching his neck over Naruto's right shoulder. Sure enough, there it was, but bigger, and knottier. Same drill. Grab, tug, look. Grab, tug, examine. Grab, tug, gasp.

 

No, that wasn't his gasp. He held still for a moment before he realized this was the same thing that had happened to him earlier. The memory replayed in a new context, and suddenly meanings that he had hidden from himself were made obvious. He tried to stop himself at every turn, but the logic moved on with a force of its own. The helpless positions they had been placed in, the electricity running through his body while he waited to be untied, and the hungry eyes Naruto made at him once he was free. That feeling of being examined and devoured, almost as if he were naked and on display. He was getting very, very turned on, had been for some time, and the acceptance sent a fresh shock of arousal through his entire body. He barely contained a whimper when the shockwave hit, and he thought he heard Naruto's breath catch again. This was a scenario he was utterly unprepared for, and ignoring it had only made it worse.

 

He had walked into a slow-motion car crash, whistling the whole time.

 

Sasuke forced himself to return to working on the knot, causing the body below him to relax slightly. This time his attention wasn't fully on the task. He was thinking about... things he wasn't supposed to think about. Things he had ignored for a long time. Things he had never wanted to interfere with his life. Well, it was interfering now. He was attracted to Naruto with a force he hadn't known could exist. He wasn't sure what that meant. Gay? That thought quickly shut his brain down, giving him a solid 30 seconds of work on the rope before the hamster wheels rebooted and began again. If he was gay, how would he rebuild his clan? How would his father have reacted? Was he going to have to keep this a secret?

 

How would he look Naruto in the eyes ever again?

 

He wasn't sure if being gay even mattered on that score, because something told him they'd gone too far down this path for things to ever be the same again, even if he'd slept with every woman in Fire Country. Naruto was below him, possibly feeling the same attraction, and both of them bound and powerless. That sent a small thrill through his body too, though he kept his composure until he thought he heard a gentle sigh and it ricocheted through his body and he knew, he knew he didn't just whimper. There were deep, important mysteries present here, but his brain was too fogged by lust and confusion and fear to grasp them. Only one other thing mattered, and that was, did Naruto feel the same way? It seemed very likely, but he had to be sure. He couldn't risk an assumption. That's the sort of thing that could get him killed, or worse, rejected and humiliated. He respected Naruto too much for that, too, he realized.

 

It was funny the weird things that would make you come clean with yourself. Brush out all the skeletons in your closet. Well, some of them, anyway.

 

Time to set up an experiment. A portion of the knot he hadn't touched yet, farther in. He altered the angle of attack and moved towards it, overshooting and scraping thin skin with his teeth and lip, accidentally-on-purpose and oh-so-sorry. Naruto was holding his breath again, so Sasuke finished the combo by exhaling on the mark he had just touched, speeding the evaporation of the saliva and causing a simultaneous cooling and warming of the area.

 

Naruto moaned. Honest to god, he moaned, and Sasuke couldn't help himself, he bit. Not hard, just... somewhere to put his teeth, for safe-keeping. Anchored. That caused another throaty gasp, and Sasuke was so hard now, he didn't know what he would do.

 

He knew what he wanted to do. He wanted to grab Naruto and kiss the motherfucking daylights out of him, possibly grinding his crotch against him and humping like a misbehaving dog. He'd never _really_ kissed anyone before, and he was pretty sure Naruto hadn't either, and neither of them had hands, and that just seemed like a dumb idea. He wanted to have some control over the situation, and fucking Kakashi had...

 

Control! Another involuntary shudder, and this time Naruto responded. He felt lips against his neck, and teeth, scraping just lightly. Naruto definitely wanted him, experiment successful. He managed to stifle a moan only partially, causing Naruto to whimper, and if they kept this up they were just going to drive each other crazy with sounds and little bites. He supposed that was a kind of oral sex, and the two words colliding together in his mind made him so dizzy he collapsed backwards into Naruto's lap, panting.

 

Naruto was looking at him in some kind of advanced level of surprise. His face was also flushed pink, echoing the burning sensation in Sasuke's own cheeks, and it seemed somehow adorable and sexy at the same time. Only now it was time for him to say something dumb, because he made the mistake of looking him in the eye. "Sa... su... ke," and it almost wasn't a word, just a series of little sighs. Each syllable was its own, separate question. The other words didn't seem to want to come out, and that was good. If he kept talking, Sasuke was going to have to shut him up, and he didn't want to kiss him yet. The thought made his whole body hum, but he wasn't going to do it, and the ache felt good in its own way. He could be patient. What did he want? Control. He was bound, but Naruto was bound more. He was in control, and had been this whole time without noticing it. He had been too confused with the frail, dizzy out-of-control feeling that had accompanied being bound, and he realized that, yes, that felt good too. Maybe he should savor this. Maybe he should...

 

Naruto seemed like he still wanted to say something, but Sasuke finally had a moment of clarity. "Shut up," he said firmly. This time he was looking Naruto straight in the eye. Naruto seemed shocked, then realization dawned on him. Sasuke wasn't mocking him, but commanding him. He closed his mouth, didn't even nod, and Sasuke darted down to his neck below his chin. Naruto flinched, possibly expecting a kiss, but was soon sighing again in pleasure. Sasuke was tasting him, alternating between light kisses and nibbles, and harder bites. He was tempted to suck harder, but remembered something someone had said to him once about "hickeys", and decided visible marks were out of the question. It was difficult to be satisfied with just this, though, even with Naruto breaking in and stealing a kiss on his neck or cheek now and then, sighing in his ear and making him feel crazy.

 

He was suddenly glad his cursed seal mark was on the other side, because he had no idea how he would live through the day if Naruto touched it like this.

 

At some point, Sasuke remembered that he was supposed to be helping Naruto escape, not discovering why he'd always heard the words "make-out" in hushed, reverent tones. That's fine, he could do both, he was a goddamn Uchiha. He tipped his hips up and raised himself to Naruto's ear, ghosting kisses around the edge and darting in a quick tongue, before returning to work on the knot. Naruto growled in disappointment, but Sasuke kept him guessing with his teeth and tongue. Now that he didn't have to avoid touching Naruto, the work seemed to go faster and infinitely more pleasantly. He ached for more, deep in his belly and groin, but first he needed to free a few more layers of restraints. When he made visible progress, he would stop and tease with his mouth, then return to work. It didn't seem nearly so long when the last loop fell open, and the rope loosened.

 

Sasuke growled deep in his throat in anticipation, though he wasn't sure of what. Naruto was looking at him with drooping eyes, like he was drunk on some unknown liquor, but a quick shake of his shoulders indicated he was still stuck tight to the bedframe. Sasuke supposed it fell to him to remove the rest of the rope. He took the end of it in his mouth, and attempted awkwardly to fling it to the other side. He needed to be anchored to make the motion natural, and he had an idea, an audacious idea. His cheeks flushed again, but he ignored them as he scooted closer in Naruto's lap. Close enough that he could feel Naruto beneath him, and Naruto could probably feel Sasuke's erection brushing against his stomach. The contact was electric, wrong-but-right.

 

This moment. This was forbidden. Even more than kissing (and he reminded himself that he would not do that, not yet, not yet), this was something that he absolutely must not do. He managed to look steadily at Naruto, who seemed not to be processing the situation, eyes unfocused, lips parted with teeth barely visible. Sasuke should absolutely not have just settled willingly into his lap, should not have squeezed his thighs around warm hips. Naruto's eyes focused then, boring into him questioningly. Afraid? In answer, Sasuke merely did the one thing that he should never, ever do, and rolled his hips forward in a quick, shallow thrust.

 

Immediately pleasure drowned out everything else as his cock had rubbed against the the hard stomach before him. Naruto emitted a strangled gasp and threw back his head, thrusting his own hips upward against Sasuke's ass, and suddenly the room was so hot, so hot, there wasn't enough air, and he was panting, his teeth scraping once more at Naruto's abused shoulder. What was he doing again? He couldn't remember, he was too absorbed in the incredible feeling coursing through his body as he thrust forward again, Naruto answering, both of them making sounds that were so sinful, so wrong, so hot. Dimly a part of him observed that his "man card" had been shredded, burned, and tossed to the wind, but he couldn't bring himself to care.

 

Oh Kami, but he wanted to have sex with Naruto, the very thought hitting him like a baseball bat to the face. Was it something he had always wanted? He didn't know, didn't care. This wasn't even far from it, dry humping him, his forehead resting helplessly on Naruto's shoulder as he was carried away by sensation and need. He could feel a hard heat between his legs, pushing against his ass every time he moved, and it should have been scaring him but it was just making him want more. It shouldn't have been possible but the thought of what "more" would entail made him blush even more deeply, a groan forming deep in the back of his throat and vibrating sensually through his chest. How far should they take this? How far would they? There was no going back, only forward, because the option to stop and cool off was taken away from them by their sadistic, perverted teacher.

 

"Sas-ke!" The plaintive cry accompanied by a long, deep moan in his ear nearly drove him over the edge then, eyes wide, and he realized light-headedly that they were too close. Naruto was going to come and so was he if he didn't assert his control again. With a stab of terror he realized he had no idea how the seals would react to an orgasm (or two), and that they were still in terrible danger. He growled, pulling away from Naruto who looked simultaneously hurt and disappointed and not-entirely-there.

 

"Not yet, the tags," he panted, sounding more sure of himself than he really was. A dark look passed over Naruto's eyes, reassured and something else. Sinful. Tempting. Defiant, even.

 

"Later, then," Naruto answered. If it was possible to pass out from the rush of blood to his dick, Sasuke would have just done it. "Hell, bastard, how the fuck are you so sexy all the sudden? Did that pervert drug us or something?"

 

Sasuke could only shake his head absently as he continued with his plan, stage I-don't-fucking-care-anymore, vital to step as-long-as-it-leads-to-fucking. He grabbed the loose end of the rope again with his teeth, and, squeezing his legs around Naruto in an intermittent rhythm to anchor himself and keep his body from killing him with lust, wove back and forth to slowly unwrap Naruto's torso. In truth, he couldn't dismiss the possibility as easily as that. But deep behind the screaming need that filled his whole body, it felt real. No genjutsu, no compulsion, no foggy judgment. If anything, he felt liberated. "I don't think so," between mouthfuls of rope, "but we're going to kill him nice and slow anyway." Naruto responded with an evil grin, and then it vanished was he focused on the sensation of the undulating squeezes around his waist. A year and a half later, when he was finished, Naruto gave another wiggle to confirm that he was, in fact, still tied to the bedframe.

 

"Well shit. I guess we've hit a dead-end," replied Sasuke helpfully. Naruto was frowning in his ridiculous scrunched-up imitation of a thoughtful face, eyes closed. Sasuke tried to wrack his brains for answers, the tent in his shorts making it impossible to think for more than a few seconds before returning his attention to the warm body beneath him. Finally, he gave up and tensed his thighs again, causing Naruto's eyes to fling open with a hazy look, trapping Sasuke's gaze like a butterfly in a jar. Blue Morpho, he stupidly thought, a butterfly with the same hue as those shining eyes, and before he knew it he was inching forward towards Naruto's lips.

 

"Key," said the lips as he hovered over them, unsure how to attack. Naruto's breath was hot and smelled like tonkatsu, reminding him that he was getting hungry. "I think I know where it is." Then he closed his mouth, flushed deeply, and turned away to peer deeply into the farthest corner of the room.

 

For the better part of several hours, Sasuke had been hoping Naruto would keep his mouth shut. Now he wanted to grab him by the collar and shake him until he spilled everything in his head. "For Kami's sake," he mentally redacted several insults, "tell me! My arms are gonna fall off at this rate!" Also we might die. Virgins.

 

"Ano..." then Naruto's eyes wandered somewhere below Sasuke's neck, in the indeterminate space of his black T-shirt. Suddenly he was acting as embarrassed as he had been when it had all started, and that was after nearly jizzing in his pants. Sasuke had a very, very bad feeling. "Well, first off, shouldn't we check the seals? You know, see if the bastard's been lying to us?" Blue eyes met black with a sheepish grin.

 

Well, Sasuke couldn't deny the wisdom in that, even if it was an obvious ploy for time. Safety first and all, because they weren't constantly trying to stab each other to death or anything. He snorted and dropped his head in acknowledgement and temporary defeat, then scooted back a few feet. Quickly, not even trying to exploit the contact out of sheer annoyance, he dipped his head and grabbed the stomach of Naruto's shirt. Then he knee-walked forward again, and handed the fabric off to Naruto's dumbfounded (and dumb) mouth. He lingered there only a moment more than necessary, and backed off again to look.

 

It was a real seal, alright, even a genin could see that. "It's definitely explosive," he said, eying the central pattern and the ominous lines emanating from it. "But something’s strange." Naruto made a curious noise, but didn't bother trying to get words out through the spittle that was quickly coating his white undershirt. He looked for a few moments longer, and then he realized it. The elemental portion of the seal was altered. "It's not a fire seal. It's water-based."

 

That did it, and Naruto spit his shirt out. "What does that mean? Is it safe after all?"

 

"How the hell should I know!?" Seeing Naruto's anxiety, he shut his mouth quickly before he started a stupid argument. He tried again, more thoughtfully. "I don't see why he would make such an elaborate modification for no reason. If I were trying to spoof a seal, I'd at least make it look ordinary. It must be related to the chakra-sensing trigger." He shrugged. "Safest to assume it's real. Best case scenario, we play it safe unnecessarily but live. Worst-case scenario, we play it safe and avoid being blown to bits." That was decided, if not terrifying. "Now tell me where the damned key is."

 

Naruto nodded at the wisdom of the plan, then looked away again, cheeks seemingly burnt into a permanent crimson. "It's in my pants."

 

Sasuke choked on his own spit.

 

Thirty seconds of coughing later, Sasuke gained enough control over himself to sit back up and think. Of course, the pervert would require him to take off Naruto's pants (with his fucking mouth!) in order to escape. It was the surest indictment of the intentionality of the whole set-up, and a part of him wanted to laugh, and laugh, and laugh until the ANBU came and took him to a cell with less concrete and more padding. Then, a darker thought.

 

Kakashi had put his hand down Naruto's pants.

 

He felt a surge of anger and only barely caught himself trying to reflexively activate his Sharingan, and he quelled the chakra immediately. "Death would be too quick," he said. His voice was hollow and distant, and spoke of dark things. "We need to be more creative than that. More... psychological." Naruto was looking at him with genuine alarm, and Sasuke wondered then if he'd be able to do kill Kakashi with his eyes alone.

 

There was a stretch of silence that seemed to form between them physically, isolating them with their thoughts. Then Naruto broke it down, pelting it with tiny words. "You don't have to you know. This is... just too much." He seemed to want to say more, but bit his own lip into submission. When Naruto exerted self-control, Sasuke was beginning to feel he should always be nervous. Not that he needed help being nervous today!

 

He sighed in surrender, eyes falling shut in exhaustion. "I'll do it, but only if you want me to." What was this, some stupid love song? Did he really say those words? When he opened his eyes Naruto was looking at him again, intensely boring into his eyes. Looking for something. Occasionally looking down in thought, then back to him. Considering. Probing.

 

"Okay," he said, and his face held the same it's-going-to-happen look as earlier, and dammit if Sasuke's heart didn't flutter. Sasuke must have looked shocked because the expression softened, and he repeated "it's okay. We're a team, we can do it. Let's get the fuck out of this sadistic trap."

 

Sasuke snorted and nodded his head a fraction. Sometimes Naruto was such an idiot, and sometimes he knew exactly the right thing to do or say. Then he usually went right back to being an idiot, but that little bit of sense always seemed to be enough. "Hai."

 

If he were honest with himself (and he was always one-hundred-and-ten-percent honest with himself), Sasuke should have been giddy at the chance. This is what he had been wanting during the frantic humping and necking, to feel and do more. But the reality of it was simply terrifying. Did Naruto want more, or did he just want to get out of the situation alive? Were they ready for more? Was it all happening too fast? How did any of this adult stuff work, anyway?

 

At times like this he was thankful that he was a genius. Even if he had no idea now, he was sure to figure _something_ out if he tried hard enough.

 

He made no effort this time not to lick his lips. The flavor was slightly different now, less adhesive and more Naruto, reminding him of the frenzy before this moment. He was terrified. He wanted to do it, and yet he was being forced to do it, which seemed reason enough to run screaming from the room no matter what his dick was telling him. If only he had that liberty. Naruto's gaze held steady, silent, patient, encouraging. And there was still the problem that while he had permission to look for the key, he wasn't sure if he had permission for anything else, and if he thought beyond that particular problem something in his brain seemed to short-circuit and he had to begin the entire thought again. So it was almost two minutes after the issue had been settled before he scooted off of Naruto's lap and finally looked down.

 

Hey, he thought, Naruto's a guy. This intelligent observation brought to you by Sasuke's dick, and if Sasuke thought he had been blushing before, he had been completely wrong. Naruto was evidently at least half-hard, some of the blood permanently diverted into his cheeks, but it was enough to make him wonder if he were completely crazy, and maybe the best way to solve the problem was to set the seals off after all and hope he woke up in the hospital without a penis. That would solve a great deal of problems, like, did he want to go down on his best friend? Should he still try to stab him to death daily? Was he a flaming homo? Did he care? And many others.

 

Naruto cleared his throat even more dramatically this time. "Are you just gonna stare at my prick or are you going to take off my fucking pants so we can get out of here?" Just as he'd said, prime fucking Hokage material. To emphasize the point he scooted his hips forward as far as he could, so the buttons on his stupid orange pants were more easily reached.

 

Sasuke didn't know how to start, so he did the only thing he could think of. He backed up a bit further and then lowered his upper body down into Naruto's lap, until his chest was resting on the other boy's knees. It kinda hurt, which was probably good because it might have a chance of keeping him focused on his objective, which was definitely a key and not a cock. Now the really stupid part, burying his face in Naruto's lap. He didn't give himself time to think as he attacked the buttons, trying very hard to ignore the hot flesh of Naruto's stomach or the spicy smell there. It smelled like sweat, and something else, something that he only smelled when... he shut that thought down too late as his own cock twitched, again painfully erect and feeling cold at the loss of their previous sitting position. So close and yet so far, yet far too close for comfort.

 

He thought he heard Naruto sigh through his nose, but couldn't be sure. There was too much rustling of clothing around his ears as he moved. It would be easiest to get it over with quickly, whatever "it" was, so he grabbed the corner of the pants opening with his teeth and tried to pull the fabric around the button. It didn't come away the first try, so he bobbed back in closer and wiggled it around, making Naruto grunt above him and brushing something warm and hard beneath his neck. Hands were so convenient! He wished he had some, so he could hold himself away from the warm cock below, or maybe just not have to use his face to accomplish every task. It only took a few seconds of pulling this way and that for the little button to spring free and expose several more inches of stomach and the top of a zipper.

 

"God, that is so hot. Do you do that with all the ladies?" The words were joking but the voice was dead serious, and he thought he could hear panting above him.

 

Sasuke turned halfway, fixing him with one deadly eye. "Shut the fuck up. Not my fault you've never had anyone in your pants." It was skirting the terms of their agreement, but Naruto had started it. Still, maybe a little below the belt. Naruto emphasized the point by bucking upwards and firmly rubbing his clothed cock into Sasuke's cheek. Sasuke's eyes snapped wide and stared dumbly ahead, the proximity suddenly suffocating and impossible to ignore. Finally he relaxed with a shuddering breath. "Fine. You asked for it." He really had no idea what he meant by that ultimatum, no idea at all. There was just a persistent buzzing in the back of his head behind the analysis of how much it would hurt to get his tongue stuck in a zipper, and he pretended to ignore it. He was so good at that and it always worked out perfectly.

 

The zipper was tiny, metal, and the stupidest thing ever invented. Stupider than hula-hoops and bendy-straws. Even stupider than birthdays. After watching it long enough to know it wouldn't bite (unprovoked), he darted his tongue out and lifted the little pull tab, then grabbed it in his teeth. Teeth and metal didn't go well together, and he resolutely ignored the peculiar taste in favor of trying to tug the tiny thing downward without letting go. He only made it an inch before the bunching of the fabric stopped all progress, but now he could see the waistband of Naruto's boxers. One fear he hadn't realized he was harboring calmed itself as he reassured himself that Naruto was, in fact, wearing underwear like a sane person. Now, if he'd had hands, he would hold the fabric straight and it would unzip quickly, but now he'd have to grab and tug every which-a-way until each peak and valley of hideous orange fabric was cleared. Naruto either tried to help or couldn't help himself by shifting upwards from time to time, making small, whimpering sounds. By the time he was finished, having dropped the zip several times, he was panting with the effort and his neck was sore again. He looked up and was transfixed for several long moments by Naruto's panting mouth, his eyes having slid shut some time ago.

 

It seemed like each step in this long, idiotic game got harder. Well, some things were getting harder at least. Sasuke realized he'd been rubbing his own erection against Naruto's legs and bit the inside of his cheek in irritation at his lack of self-control. Now he needed to actually get the pants off. "Spread your legs. When I start pulling, I need you to lift your hips and wiggle. I can't do all the work." He tried to keep enough irritation and boredom in his voice to preserve his dignity, but his eyes locked with Naruto's then, blue eyes looking down at him in wonder. What the hell, why not. They both knew what kind of game they were playing now. Naruto shyly complied as Sasuke rearranged himself so that he was kneeling oh-so-compliantly between his legs. Keeping his eyes firmly locked to his teammate's, he pressed his knees against the ground and slid back slowly, dragging his chin deliberately down the length of the bulge that poked through the thin boxers, past the hole of the open zipper, and finally stopped beneath the seam at his crotch. Then, with Naruto staring at him as if he'd just invented sex with a pair of rocks and a stick, Sasuke bared his teeth visibly for several seconds. Before Naruto's eyes could leap out of his head he dashed forward, catching a mouthful of orange fabric in his teeth. Naruto yelped and pulled back on raw instinct, clasping his legs together while Sasuke pulled up and backwards and refused to let go of the pants like a terrier hunting a rat. He continued to pull until he could see white thighs peeking under the fishcake-themed boxers (really?) and he could no longer stand the taste of dirt and sweat.

 

Such interesting flavors, today. His mind seized up again when he thought of the ones that might await him.

 

"Warn me before you bite my balls off, psycho!" Naruto's face was a bit whiter but still flushed, and seemed to be trying to wiggle back into the corner. He couldn't shield himself from view for the same reason that Sasuke had developed one hundred and one new uses for his face, and Sasuke afforded himself a predatory leer that was only half for show. He smirked, crouching still between Naruto's legs, fabric bunched around him that he knew damn well would be too much trouble to remove the rest of the way. He wasn't sure either of them had stopped panting in the last fifteen minutes, and wondered vaguely why neither of them had hyperventilated and passed out.

 

Then he remembered his ostensible goal. He hadn't heard any clinks of metal but they'd been moving pretty vigorously. "Where is the key, exactly?" Naruto's eyes widened, and he looked down at himself, silly blush still intact. Another reason they should both have passed out an hour ago, all of their blood having taken residence in their faces and groins. He'd been pretty damn horny before, he'd thought, but no hormonal episodes could have prepared him for this. He wasn't sure how time was passing in the dim windowless cell, but he figured he had an hour or two to go before he would need to check himself into the hospital or risk permanent harm to his dick.

 

Naruto closed his eyes, rolled his head backwards against the bedframe and huffed loudly. "Probably in there somewhere," his voice a little too loud and full of false levity. "I can't feel it anymore but I think I felt it before. I doubt it went too far."

 

Sasuke actually bit his tongue to avoid implying that it might have crawled up his ass. Instead, he straightened his spine and took a deep breath through his nose, let it out through his mouth, and repeated the process several times. He opened his eyes, forgetting that he had closed them, and found he had Naruto's full attention. Shit was about to get real. Not like all those other times it only seemed to get real. This was the real "real," the kind he couldn't take back. Different than necking or dry-humping or practically admitting you wanted to fuck your best-enemy-turned-friend. In fact, it made the kissing he'd considered before seem trivial and easy, despite never having done that before and being terrified of the idea even now.

 

"Tell me it's okay." All the mocking and teasing was gone. The deliberate temptation and the fuck-me glances, disappeared.

 

"Sasuke." He briefly wondered at the oddness of continually hearing his name out of Naruto's mouth without the sting of insults or blows, but Naruto continued. "I trust you."

 

Trust him to... what? Ignoring the powerful feeling in his stomach and cock, Sasuke dropped his eyes and took one thing at a time. He leaned down and gripped another mouthful of fabric in his teeth, this time above a leg where there was no implied risk of imminent castration. He pulled more gently, so as not to tear the fabric, absently thinking that it might be easier if not more painful to just rip the offending material away entirely. But Naruto was true to his end of the bargain and with some wiggling and a few tense moments it joined the horribly orange pants in a pool by Naruto's knees. If Sasuke ever got to Naruto's closet, the entire wardrobe was going up in a regrettable Katon accident. Sasuke took a few moments to steady himself then, not sure what he wanted to see when he looked up.

 

It actually took Naruto to break the tension. "Look, it's okay. It's right there." And before he could stop himself, he was looking, at... everything. From his view by Naruto's knees he could see exactly what he'd been dreading, Naruto's half-erect penis jutting sideways from a patch of curly blonde hair, and below that a scrotum that looked like it was hiding from the sudden cold, hoping no-one would ever see it. If Sasuke's skin had ever held any pigment it would have faded white as ash, but that was its normal color so he merely compensated by reddening insanely. "Sasuke. Earth to Sasuke!" He looked up again to meet Naruto's eyes, a look that had passed beyond embarrassment to complete equanimity. He was a fucking Zen master. "The key," he said slowly, two concrete syllables, and redirected his gaze again. This time Sasuke followed the correct direction, Naruto's left thigh, on which lay a small silver key.

 

Sasuke had stopped thinking several minutes ago. There was simply no blood left for his brain, so he moved with surprising confidence toward the key before he realized his next problem. Not only was it next to Naruto's cock, which was getting stiffer by the moment, but he was going to have an even harder time if he managed to drop it. There was no good way to get between or beneath Naruto's legs, so it was important he grab it on his first try. If he could do that, and lift it to Naruto's mouth, than the next move would be on him for once. But even before that, there was... his restraint was crumbling. He should have been terrified but he wasn't anymore, at least not that he could feel. So much new sensation and lust had driven him past the point of caring about what his friend thought of him and all he could think of was the present moment, and what it contained. So it shouldn't have come as such a surprise to him when he lowered his face the other side of Naruto's lap and rested his cheek against his searing hot skin.

 

The world kind of fell apart then.

 

As far as Sasuke went, he greatest blow had been the softness of the skin. Naruto's thigh was rough with little hairs poking into his face, but on his right cheek the iron heat felt silken smooth. He could vaguely feel Naruto wiggle, not too much (perhaps he was worried about the key falling, but Sasuke didn't care anymore), gasp and mumble incoherently. Sasuke's mind was completely blank, all thoughts blown away and standing in the quiet eye of the hurricane. The cock twitched, pressing against his face, and he hummed some unnamed emotion in answer. The smell itself was intoxicating, reminding him of every private moment when he'd lost control of his own body, but still distinctly belonging to Naruto. Eventually both of them were still, and Sasuke realized that he had no endgame here. Naruto had invited the proximity but not the action, and while he knew what he himself wanted, he needed more direction from Naruto before he could go further. Keeping his eyes closed and his face relaxed, he finally spoke.

 

"Naruto, you said you trusted me. What do you trust me to do?"

 

The other boy was silent at least a full minute before answering, but Sasuke didn't allow fear to take hold, and kept his breathing even and relaxed.

 

"What do you want to do?" He had dodged the question, of course. Two could play that game.

 

"Let's say for the sake of argument," Sasuke began lazily, as if he were Shikamaru playing a game of Shoji, "that I have something that I want to do. Would I have permission to do it? Or does your permission apply only to some things and not... others?" The final word came out sounding almost dreamlike, reverberating in the air between them and just... implying.

 

More silence. Sasuke risked opening his left eye and looking upwards. Naruto's eyes were squeezed shut as if blocking out the whole world instead of just this tiny room, and Sasuke suddenly felt helpless instead of the one in command, and a throaty moan escaped him by complete surprise. Naruto echoed him with a ragged gasp a moment later and suddenly the room was a thousand degrees warmer, the ANBU having clearly launched the entire prison compound straight into the sun.

 

"Whatever you want, Sasuke." Only shinobi ears would have heard it, but it was enough. Oh Kami it was enough, and he nearly wet his pants with the pleasure and anticipation that traveled down his spine and into his gut. The seals, he reminded himself, he must remain in control. There would be time for more later. Or there might never be again, and he was going to take advantage of what little he had.

 

He was completely out of his mind and he knew it, and he didn't even care. It didn't matter that he was risking both their lives. It didn't matter at that moment that this was the closest he'd been to another man's cock, or that he hadn't known before today that he was even attracted to members of the same species, much less the same gender. What mattered was the hot, needy body beneath him, droplets of liquid seeping out of the red tip and inviting him to taste. So he did the only thing he could do, he tasted. He turned his head around and gingerly snaked out his tongue, his new third hand, and gingerly touched the skin at the base of his shaft. Nothing exploded. No-one died. Naruto though had begun to tremble, and he spared a glance upward to make sure he was alright. His eyes were squeezed shut and his teeth clamped together, and Sasuke started to worry until an eye opened and quirked a brow at him. Get on with it. He didn't need to be told a third time, and so he lifted his head. His tongue sucked back in momentarily, gathering saliva, and then he placed a long flat-tongued lick up the base of Naruto's shaft. There was a sound above him of skull meeting thin sheet metal, and then a long lusty groan that made his blood catch fire in his veins. Incoherent muttering, maybe his name, maybe a nursery rhyme, he didn't care. His tongue was too busy thinking for him, in cahoots with his dick. He was curious now, though, and when he finished a second lick up the side of his would-be popsickle, he darted his tongue forward and across the little slit at the head. As he pulled his tongue back to properly consider the flavor, the organ betrayed him and twitched forward like a spring, and some hungry instinct made him catch the tip fully in his mouth rather than get bopped in the nose.

 

Naruto bucked wildly, now, then froze, both of them looking at the key. It had stayed put, perhaps glued by the sweat of their earlier activity, and that was fine because Sasuke was only planning on stopping if Naruto ordered him to or ANBU intervened. Or like, maybe explosion and death. That worked too. Naruto's eyes were now glued on him, his mouth open and breathing heavily. "Fuck... Sasuke. What the..." That did not constitute an order to stop, so Sasuke closed his eyes against further distraction and ran his tongue in a quick circle around the head of the penis currently occupying his mouth. Salty and alkaline, with a faint sweetness. The flavor didn't interest him, he realized, only what it signified. Of that he wanted more. He continued the circular motion, pressing with the flat of his tongue on the sensitive head and then licked at the tiny ridge on the underside just below, and it took only a minute or two before Naruto's voice had stopped trying to form words and become much more useful, forming instead a series of animalistic moans and growls. Each sound ricocheted through his body, making him vibrate with pleasure and a need so sharp he was surprised his pants didn't fall off in tatters. He had to satisfy himself instead with grinding his legs together in his cramped crouch, and he moaned too around the cock in his mouth, wanting more. He could get it, too. Pulling away briefly, he stole another innocent lick, breathing hot air on his balls before continuing slowly upward. Hot eyes were on his, and he was surprised the air hadn't caught fire already. When he at last reached the tip again, he closed his eyes slowly in Naruto's full view, then bowed his head, pursed his lips and plunged. His flat tongue once again pressed against the underside but this time his entire hot mouth was pressing from all sides, and Naruto lost himself in a loud wail, nearly a scream of pleasure.

 

Sasuke almost remembered to be concerned that someone would hear, but forgot again as Naruto thrust up into him. The natural thing to do at this point was to grab Naruto's hips and hold him down so that he wouldn't gag, but his face was his only tool and was currently occupied, so he instead focused on relaxing his throat. He was otherwise helpless to resist Naruto as he bucked a second time, a third... a fourth... and once again a wave of helplessness hit him as he held on and deep-throated with all his life. A growl was coming from somewhere in his chest, even if his entire upper vocal system was occupied. He felt an incredible sensation pooling in his body, behind his eyes and deep down, where he couldn't focus his attention. Too distracted by Naruto.

 

He almost didn't feel the flash of heat pressed against his chest, its source decidedly not from his own body.

 

But he was a ninja after all. He leapt backwards in sheer terror, and caught a glimpse of the same expression of Naruto's now-pale face before he hit the ground. His arms broke his fall this time, at least partially, so he could forgive them for protecting his spine and then bending it backwards to smack his skull against rough concrete. Oh yes, that hurt. That hurt good.

 

He waited for Naruto to speak, and when he didn't he weakly raised his head in a minor afterpanic. He was just wearing that same shocked expression, then he gradually lowered his head, allowing his loose hair to fall about his face a little. "Ooooh... fuck Sasuke. That was close. That was too close." Then he was panting again. That's an improvement. Breathing is good, but sexy panting is sexy.

 

"Sorry," Sasuke answered lamely. Then, "I guess that's what you get for trusting me." It was like punching himself in the stomach, and he deserved it. Naruto for his part met his eyes again, and the look he received was so wanton he decided he would do it all again in a heartbeat. He rolled over on his side, then his stomach, and repeated the familiar process of crawling over to Naruto's lap, and quickly picked up the key. He no longer understand why he'd worried about it before, it was the easiest thing in the world now to dip his head next to the slick and dripping cock standing attention next to the key, and grasp the latter with his teeth. Then he straightened, and with his eyes just out of focus he brought the key to Naruto's lips.

 

Now this was difficult. Breath whistled through his lips around the key, just a fraction of an inch away from his first real kiss. Someday when Sakura was being particularly annoying he'd have to tell her he'd sucked cock and kissed in that order, and enjoy watching her go to pieces and never bother him again. Then again, he didn't want to think about Sakura at all right now, did he? And neither did he want to kiss, for real, not just yet. Instead he sucked the key into his mouth, tasting yet more grimy metal, and used his tongue to orient the key so that the operational part faced him. Then he slowly leaned in toward Naruto, and the moment he felt teeth click solidly around the rounded grip, he pulled back. The other boy actually looked slightly hurt, and on impulse Sasuke leaned in for a kiss on his cheek before turning around and getting to his feet.

 

This time waiting cost him nothing at all but a hum of anticipation and some pain in his calves as he adjusted to a height that would allow Naruto to operate the key. And it worked. The damn lock sprung open and the entire device clattered to the floor with a heavy reverberation. Sasuke was free. All of him. In fact, if it weren't for the locked door, he could just walk out right now.

 

The cautious expression on Naruto's face indicated that he, too, felt the power differential widen, so almost as soon as Sasuke had gotten to stretch his aching legs, he was back on his knees, crawling on all fours this time, luxuriant stretches not even for show. Like a cat in no particular hurry, he crawled back over Naruto's lap and gave one final, long stretch of his back. Then he sat down, kneeling just in front of the naked lap before him. He felt like a different person now, and Naruto was looking at him like one. It was like Naruto had done when the ropes first came off, only this time there was no timidity, only desire with a hint of submission mixed with challenge, the key dropped forgotten on the dusty floor.

 

He couldn't say, at that point, what caused him to close his eyes and pant Naruto's name wantonly, without even being touched. But it didn't matter, because the next moment one hand was behind Naruto's neck and the other was fisted in soft hair, and suddenly their lips were scant millimeters apart and they were both panting like they'd been fucking for hours. In fact, if he were capable of thinking about it, he would have been forced to conclude that they had. He slid his right hand up from the vulnerable neck and traced the whiskers on Naruto's cheeks with his thumb, and challenging blue eyes never wavered, never left his own. Then his index finger trailed along the line of his jaw, triggering the smallest shiver, and that was when he snapped. Both hands pulled them together and what he had initially planned as a tentative kiss was already too fast for him, and their lips stilled in panic.

 

It was nothing like he had imagined, intense only because of the ideas he had attached to it but lackluster in itself. Anticlimactic but momentous. Until a tongue cautiously traced his upper lip, timid and unsteady like Sasuke's whole frame. He shifted his right hand to the back of Naruto's neck then and suddenly they both moved, Naruto's head falling farther to the side and his mouth meeting his at a ninety degree angle. It was perfect, and Sasuke found himself sliding, eyes closed, into another world.

 

This was a real kiss, not even remotely related to the idiotic episode they'd had at the academy. Tentatively, experimentally, he pressed with his lips, still not daring to use his tongue in a foreign land. The moment was echoed by Naruto, and soon they were engaged in a soft mutual exploration, punctuated by the occasional sharp breath through the nose, the clack of their teeth, or a muffled sigh. After several minutes Sasuke came back to himself, remembering his own hands and Naruto's unexplored body. Leaving one hand cradled on the neck under that magic spot that made it work, the other running through his scalp for a moment before moving downward. His fingers followed his shoulder down, over surprisingly well-developed pectoral muscles, barely touching a nipple with his thumb before continuing further south, to better-explored territory. Fortified with his own damn saliva. The soft pads of his fingers barely touched the ridge above Naruto's pubic bone, and he was rewarded with the amazing sensation of feeling Naruto moan into his mouth. Causing him to respond in kind. And then, that tongue along his lip again, then slowly crossing the threshold into his mouth. Wet, welcome, hot, a living metaphor for every dirty thing in Sasuke's mind, every one of which he planned to do someday. But fuck, he could do that too, right now, and he was running his own tongue around Naruto's and beyond into the forbidden territory of the other boy's mouth, a land of no return. The sounds coming from both of their throats seemed to amplify and return like an echo, driving him towards a familiar edge of want.

 

Before he knew what he was doing, his hand found the familiar heat of Naruto's cock, and the sounds became impossibly more heated and wanton. And dangerous. His other hand escaped the bounds of Naruto's neck and met just below his stomach, pushing with trepidation up beneath his shirt.

 

And he felt the familiar wrinkle of paper, and froze, eyes wide. Naruto was looking at him too, with pain and understanding and a little fear, even now. Especially now.

 

Breaking painfully from the kiss, he kissed the tip of Naruto's nose apologetically as he fumbled for the key. "It's over," he said, and laid a kiss of a different kind on his lips, fragile and finite and tender. When he’d finished, the manacles behind his friend's back had clicked open. This time the sound of metal clattering to the ground was different. Smaller. An oblong object of some weight, but nothing like the manacles that had been attached to Sasuke's wrists. Was it... as if on fire, Naruto skittered to the side and went about moving all his limbs in random, ridiculous ways and making a thousand sounds of complaint, while Sasuke could only look at what had fallen behind him.

 

It was indeed a large key. The manacles dangled in the air above it, chained directly to the bedpost in an expression of dumb futility.

 

"Let's go,” Sasuke said. “We have a Sensei to kill."

 

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Sakura hadn't been this exhausted since the ordeal with Gaara, but it was a good kind of exhaustion, making every muscle feel abused and loved at the same time. Her mind was trying to race with the analysis of the day's lesson, but was slowly giving up to the tired afterglow of a great workout and the promise of a hearty meal with her Sensei. Her treat.

 

"Neh, Kakashi-sensei, won't Sasuke-kun and Naruto-kun be joining us?" They had already sat down at Ichiraku's and it was like lighting a signal in the sky with a giant spiraled fish cake on it. It was only with some guilt that she started on her own serving the moment it appeared. A girl's gotta keep up her figure, and paper-thin and wasting away was not in this season, no matter what Ino seemed to think.

 

"Hmm, I wonder," he said, and there was his pretending-to-think face. Then Sakura noticed his ramen was already gone. The only reason she didn't reach across and punch him was her dramatic failure hit him the last twenty-thousand times she'd tried that day.

 

"In all seriousness, it depends on if they can complete their task. It should be about now if all goes well, but if they're not finished by tomorrow I'll intervene. They won't be happy," he added, but the upward bow of his visible eyelid left doubt as to whether he would be.

 

Sakura wondered again if she even wanted to know.

 

Hell yes, she decided, but not from Kakashi if she could at all help it. She wondered how bad it actually was, and abstractly created a proportional conversion factor for how much ramen she would need to buy to pry the details out of Naruto. X amount of trauma for Y amount of Ichiraku, and her odds seemed pretty favorable, especially if she let Naruto talk himself into thinking it was a "date." She frowned and determined only to apply that fudge factor if the variables exceeded her anticipated probability distribution. For outcomes she might consider an outlier (possibly resulting from a nonlinear relationship), she could probably count on his natural pride to puff up his accomplishments, and then fish the rest out of Sasuke later to normalize the curve. She pushed a fish cake to the other side of her broth to balance the equation, and then slurped the rest of the soup noisily.

 

Then, something was different, and it wasn't the happy warmth in her belly. It was a killing aura so intense she actually drew a kunai and was calculating where to throw it before a hand stilled her arm. "Relax, Sakura-chan, they're back. And successful!"

 

Sakura blanched and peered out into the golden gloam. Nothing but Kakashi's retreating back and the sun just starting to set. She paid quickly, with all due formality and gratitude but no more, and slipped out behind him. Quietly, because fuck all if things today weren't already really creepy weird.

 

She watched as he approached a set of bushes on the corner like an old friend, waving his hand lazily. "Yooooo," he said, pulling a small bag out of nowhere, and then looking at the angle of the sun. Two pairs of eyes were watching him, then her, then deciding he was the greater threat focused their killing hatred solely on their sensei. "Hmm," he said, audibly pleased even from across the street. "Looks like you made it in time. Not too fast, and," she could have sworn she heard Sasuke snarl, and were they not wearing their hitai-ate? And the old creep was finishing with relish, "not too slow either. Somebody has earned their Omake!" He produced yet another pouch from a fold in his clothing and dropped it into the first bag, then tossed it to Naruto, who immediately reached inside to retrieve his forehead protector, as if he were more naked without it than his outrageous orange coat, wanted by fashion police in five countries and counting.

 

She was definitely going to need to bring in some extra factors to the formula, but when she tallied the results she realized that the total might actually exceed her assets by several orders of magnitude. In short, it might well be worth more than her life to ask either of them anything, ever. She backed slowly away behind the ramen stand, if not to hide then at least be considered less of a target. The last thing she saw was a flurry of hand seals before Kakashi touched each of their chests, and then two slips of paper were floating in the air where Sasuke and Naruto had been.

 

Naruto, who had certainly not eaten since breakfast, had been within spitting distance of Ichiraku and simply left, with the speed of a ninja running either for his life or something even more valuable. And Sasuke, prickly hateful Sasuke, had gone with him, wherever that was, before the seals had fluttered to the ground.

 

Once the viscous hate had cleared from the air, she crept forward, hoping to catch Kakashi-sensei before he too escaped. "Explain. Those are explosive tags." She left unsaid how they had been attached to her friends, but illustrated it anyway with a precise wave of her clenched fist.

 

Kakashi evidently knew that there was no winning by challenging her mother hen approach, and he didn't even try. "Just a teamwork challenge, like I said before. These are something I picked up in my Genin days. Explosive water seals, a practical joke more than anything." He handed them over, and Sakura's darting eyes quickly noted the elemental substitution and a few other details, which it seemed could well have rendered them less than lethal. "I rigged these to go off if they molded a certain amount of chakra, just so they would have more of a challenge working through the puzzle themselves."

 

"So what exactly would have happened if they had gone off? Would they have been hurt?" She was partially mollified but he could tell the set of her brows promised pain if she didn't like the answer.

 

"Of course not, Sakura-chan. They would have both been covered in blue paint, and it wouldn't have washed off for a week. That would have been a valuable lesson on teamwork in itself," he said, turning to leave, the conversation apparently over.

 

Sakura was briefly overwhelmed with the immense value of such a tool, and without even looking for her tool bag she shoved the papers into the gap in her chest bindings. Straightening her dress and resuming her modest student demeanor, she called out one last question to the retreating figure in the dusk.

 

"And what about the Omake?" Like hell she was letting questions go unanswered if he were in an explanatory mood.

 

"Ah..." he turned his face back to her over his left shoulder, and raised his hitai-ate enough to blink a red eye at her once, and then lowered it safely back down. Even that little hint chilled her blood. "Part of teamwork is knowing which things you should never, ever ask a teammate about. Forget you ever heard the word, Sakura-chan. Incidentally, the symbol in the lower-right corner indicates the color." And then he was gone, having said everything he intended to say and not a word more.

 

Fair payment. She was going to need to stock up on more chakra-absorbing ink.

 

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

The way to Sasuke's house was longer, but he had also been more insistent tugging at Naruto's wrist, and as all other forms of communication had been mutually agreed as off-limits, that's where they ended up. In actuality Sasuke didn't think his overstimulated mind could take Naruto's messy apartment, and found himself not minding even in the slightest the invasion of his privacy. He pulled them both through his gate at top speed, disabling some traps and leading around others until he finally reached the front door, and slammed it behind them. Then the next natural step, he slammed Naruto against his door and dared him to escape with his eyes. He ran through a litany of seals, probing and restoring the bare minimum of traps and locks before he would feel comfortable. He could get the rest later.

 

It wasn't just a show of dominance, either, he genuinely was terrified that now that their ordeal was over, Naruto would simply leave and the whole experience would have slipped out of his grasp. He had no doubt that Naruto would haunt his dreams just like Itachi, and he simply couldn't live with that. He couldn't survive _that_ on hatred alone. But Naruto made no move to leave, he even seemed relieved to be there. He just kept fidgeting with the small bag in his hands.

 

"For Kami's sake, what?" he grabbed shoulders still clad in a light T-shirt and pressed them into the hard door, needing to be reminded of the solidity. He wanted to press them both further into the door and possibly never leave.

 

"I need to know what it is," Naruto whined like a child. Black eyes narrowed at him, then rolled in resignation, and stepped backwards as if he were expecting a bag of live snakes.

 

Naruto opened the pouch quickly, peering inside, and then dropped the whole bundle. Sasuke actually did jump back several more feet, eyes alert for movement, a weapon produced from somewhere in the hallway.

 

Sprawled out on the floor amongst their assorted clothing and equipment was a box of condoms, several bottles of lubricant, and a book labeled "Icha-Icha Presents: Safety First!"

 

A moment later, several traps were triggered at once as Sasuke's fist flew straight through the hardwood paneling of his front door. They would clean up the mess and reset the kunai later, Naruto reminded him, and dragged him away toward the bedroom. And there was revenge to plan.

 

"I was thinking One Thousand Years of Death," said Naruto, referring to the silly move Kakashi had used on his poor ass during their first training session. It could be quite painful, Naruto knew from experience.

 

"I was thinking a cattle prod," said Sasuke, leaning in for a kiss. And they immediately knew they were both right.


End file.
